“We’re Good”: Setting Breakup Boundaries Like a Boss
You can love someone and still know it is time to leave, and the way you say goodbye can protect both of your peace for a long time. As a licensed mental health counselor at Therapy with Enid, I see how much breakup boundaries matter for the high-achieving, sensitive women I work with, and Dua Lipa’s song “We’re Good” is a great example of how to do it with clarity and kindness.
You didn’t think I was done talking about boundaries, right? No way! I love this. And what better way to frame a post about setting clear boundaries in a breakup than Dua Lipa’s song “We’re Good”? It is catchy and beautiful, and it is an excellent example of how to set clear and kind boundaries when a relationship ends. Not so sure? Keep reading and see how it holds up.
What “We’re Good” Teaches About Healthy Boundaries in a Breakup
I will not reprint the lyrics here, but if you give the song a listen you will hear a breakup that moves through a handful of clear steps. Each one lines up with a boundary skill you can use:
Naming the distance, like feeling distant, abandoned, neglected, or unappreciated even when your partner is close.
Realizing that being alone is better than being coupled up and miserable.
Saying what you both can already see, plainly and without a long debate.
Honoring what you shared, because you gave it everything you could and it was fun while it lasted.
Keeping the goodbye quick and clear, since a long, drawn-out ending is not something we owe each other.
Skipping the drama and the lengthy explanations so you can end on good terms.
Setting clear expectations with no lingering hope or pining.
Respecting each other’s freedom to move on, which is a healthy sexual boundary, and remembering that clear is kind.
What does “We’re Good” have to do with healthy boundaries around breakups?
Let’s face it. We all know someone who has stayed in a relationship too long. They either couldn’t face the music, or kept making reasons and excuses to stay. It could be that they didn’t know how to tell the other person that it was time to be done. I see the first couple of reasons a lot when I do codependency treatment with women in my practice. However, this last one is almost exclusively about boundaries. How great! This is easy to learn and then can take just a bit of time to really master. Yes, you CAN be a boundary boss.
How to Have a Good, Healthy Breakup
A good breakup can happen when you have clarity around the reality of the situation and care deeply about the person. Thinking about the song, it is clear. It is kind. The way the songwriters painted the picture makes sense and fits with the way most folks would ideally like to be broken up with! I mean, of course, no one WANTS their significant other to say “it’s over”. But, it’s better to be clear and kind than for things to get ambiguous, messy, and painful, right? That’s what I find most often. So, remember, it’s not only okay to ask for what you want and need in a relationship. And, it’s also okay to end a relationship when you need to. You do not have to stay in something just because you don’t know how or when to say goodbye. Healthy boundaries and healing are key for self-love.
Therapy for a Breakup in Florida
If you are a woman in Florida who is ending a relationship or healing after one, I would love to support you. I am a licensed therapist, and I offer online therapy in Florida for women who want to feel calmer, more confident, and less alone with it all. Therapy for a breakup gives you space to process what happened, practice the boundaries you want to keep, and trust your own judgment again. Contact me to tell me a little about what you are looking for, and we can talk about whether working together feels like a good fit.
Enid DeJesus is a licensed mental health counselor who provides online therapy in Florida for high-achieving, highly sensitive women. She helps women set clear, kind boundaries in their relationships, including the hard ones that come with endings, and move out of patterns that keep them stuck. Her approach is warm and solution-focused, and her work centers on helping capable women quiet the inner critic and build steadier confidence. If you are working through a breakup and want steady support, she would love to hear from you.
